Food fight
by stocky-parker-dog
Summary: Imagine Ash. Now also imagine messy eating, annoyed Misty and a dish of gravy and chips. What does this equal? Well you wouldn't really expect anything romantic from that...So where did the kissing come from? A pokeshipping oneshot! I do NOT own the ANY of the characters. Read, Enjoy and Review please.


Misty rolled her eyes at the boy in front of her. Honestly. Could he eat any less messy?

The boy in question had managed to smear mustard all over his plump cheeks. He had mashed potato caked in his black hair…well at least the bit sticking out from under the black and red cap he wore, which had a few green peas to decorate it now. In his eyebrows, he had bits of pink that Misty didn't even want to know what it was.

Gross.

He was a total pig.

He wasn't even using his knife or fork anymore.

He was stuffing pasta into his mouth with his hands as fast as he could.

Misty pulled a face of disgust.

He ate as though he hadn't even SEEN food for about a year.

He'd already eaten 3 main course meals and was still going!

Misty stared down at her chips and gravy. Somehow it didn't look so appetizing.

She looked to Brock.

How could the older boy still be eating his steak in a calm manner, not at all disturbed by Ash's eating style? How was he ignoring Ash's display?

Even those on the table around them had asked to move to a more private spot to avoid making eye contact with the 16 year old boy almost literally shoving food down his own throat.

"Misty? Are you eating that?" Misty snapped out of her thoughts and looked at Ash. He was staring expectantly at her, licking his lips as his eyes travelled to her plate.

Misty looked down for a moment.

"Do you want these, Ash?" she asked, an evil grin twitching at the corners of her mouth.

Ash nodded enthusiastically and held his hands out expecting a plate.

"Then take it to the face!" Misty yelled. In one swift movement she'd scooped up her plate and thrown it at the poor unsuspecting boy.

Everything went quiet for a full 5 minutes, the only sound being the plate shattering on the ground after falling from Ash's face, as the boy blinked in shock, now covered in chips and gravy.

Misty cracked up laughing.

Ash's face slowly turned down into a frown.

Brock just pushed his seat out, not wanting to be a part of whatever was coming.

"Hey Ash, you know what they say, you are what you eat," Misty teased.

Ash's frown deepened.

"Your calamari, sir," the waiter said, placing a bowl of the said food in front of Ash.

Ash hardly paid attention. The only thing going through his head was 'get even' as he picked up the bowl straight away and threw it back at the giggling girl.

It was a pretty good throw and the bowl ended up onto of Misty's head.

The waiter looked slightly annoyed.

But it was nothing compared to Misty's glare as she shook the bowl from her head, making more rings go everywhere, including one that slipped over her ponytail.

"Get me a juicy steak," Misty said, glaring at Ash.

"And I'd like another bowl of carbonara," Ash said, knowing neither would be eating their meal.

Soon, they were in a full-fledged food fight. Dishes tossed back and forth, neither of them wanting to give up.

And they'd moved to deserts.

Brock sat back from the table, watching to see where it would head.

Both trainers were stubborn. And this was unlike any other fight where he could easily break it up with a snide comment about them being in love.

This wasn't a verbal fight after all and he doubted they'd even hear him properly they were that focused.

Misty flung a chocolate mud cake at him.

Ash threw a custard tart back.

By now the waiters hadn't bothered to ask them what they wanted and just kept supplying food, somewhat interested in the fight going on.

It wasn't everyday something like this would happen.

Bets were placed on which person they thought would give out first.

Misty and Ash were oblivious to anything but flinging whatever dish was brought to them next.

"ASH!" Misty screeched as some sort of jelly was dumped in her hair.

"DON'T BLAME ME!" He yelled back, "It wasn't my idea! You threw the salad at me!"

"You threw the rice pudding at me!" Misty retorted.

"And you threw that lobster at me," Ash complained, rubbing the red spot on his cheek from the lobster thrown at him.

"Well that's because you threw the chicken parmigiana at me," Misty said, grabbing the jelly slice given to her.

"You threw the honey-soy stir fry at me," Ash said, pointing to the pieces still in his hair.

His hair that no longer had a hat on anymore. It had been knocked off and forgotten about a long time ago.

"No," Misty argued, throwing the jelly slice, "You threw the dim sims at me before that."

"That wasn't as bad as the guacamole you threw before that," Ash snorted, wiping the slice from his T-shirt.

"Yeah, because that was _so_ much better than the sweet chili turnover you threw at me," Misty said sarcastically.

"Only because you threw the bowl of peas and corn," Ash said, throwing a loaf of garlic bread at her.

Misty shrieked as it bounced off her head.

"That was because you threw spinach and ricotta gnocchi in my hair," Misty pointed out. She placed the cheesecake on the table and then used her mallet like a golf club to send it straight into Ash's face.

"You grated cheese in my hair before that," Ash said, wiping it away from his eyes.

"Because you dumped pumpkin soup all over me," Misty said.

"That was only after you squeezed lemon juice all over my face," Ash complained, "Do you know much that hurts?" He grabbed the stake of strawberry jam pancakes and started throwing them like frisbees at her.

Misty fell back as 3 pancakes pelted her in the face and then two others landed in her hair.

She peeled them off and scowled.

"Gross," she said, "You threw the Mongolian beef at me before that," she said.

Using the same pancakes, she pelted them straight back at him.

"Only because you put spaghetti down my shirt," Ash said, peeling the pancakes off of him and picking up the fresh meringue pie and tossing it at her.

"You shoved raspberries down my back," she exclaimed. She picked up the closest thing, a few pickles and tossed them at him.

"You put curry in my pants!" Ash exclaimed, "That's a no go, Misty." He spat the vinegary taste from the pickles from his mouth as they directly hit his lips.

He picked up the truffles and pelted them as hard as her could at the girl.

Misty shrieked again and picked up some ice-cream before throwing it back.

"That's because you rubbed Carbonara all over me," she said, gesturing down to her top.

"Well you put steak and vegies all over me," Ash exclaimed, grabbing the pork sausages and throwing them at her.

Misty dodged the first one, only to get hit by the other three.

"That's because you threw calamari at me!" She exclaimed. She picked up a bunch of pineapple rings.

"You threw the chips and gravy at me," he said.

Misty paused, trying to think of what she'd thrown before that.

"Because you were being a pig!" She yelled eventually pelted the pineapple rings at him.

Ash's eyes widened and he tried to duck, but he was too late.

They hit him and he yelped in pain.

He fell back, holding his hands over his eyes in pain as he let out whimpering noises.

"It stings, Misty!" He exclaimed, "Get it to stop!"

Misty, realizing that he was actually hurt, crawled out from behind the table and made her way through the slush to him.

"Let me see," she demanded.

"No!" Ash exclaimed, "You hurt me!"

"Brock!" Misty yelled, turning to the boy who had been sitting back until then, "do something!"

"Ash," Brock said sternly.

Ash peeled his hands from his face and looked at Misty.

Misty gasped.

"Ash!" she exclaimed, "Your eyes!"

He was staring at her with bloodshot eyes, the acid from the pineapple making them like that.

She grabbed the bottle of water that is usually on the table and somehow remained unharmed in their food fight and dumped the contents of it onto his eyes.

"AH!" Ash yelled, "That hurts!"

"I'm sorry, Ash," Misty said, feeling guilty, "You can see still can't you? How many fingers am I holding up?" She held two fingers in front of his face.

Ash, still with water in his eyes, couldn't see properly.

"Three?" he guessed.

"Oh my goodness!" Misty exclaimed, "I've made you blind! Brock, what do I do? I made Ash blind! Ash can you hear me? Don't die! You'll be ok."

Brock watched Misty's paranoid panicking with amusement while Ash was trying to wrap his head around what she was going on about.

He'd rubbed the water from his eyes and he could see fine. Sure they still hurt a little, but he could see. What did hearing and dying have to do with anything.

"Calm down already," he said.

"Calm down?!" Misty yelled, "Don't tell me what to do. Shut up you babbling idiot."

Now Ash was even more confused.

He wasn't an idiot and he wasn't babbling. He was hardly talking.

"But, Misty," He began to protest, "I'm not even-"

Misty, on an impulsive action, grabbed his collar and smashed her mouth against his.

Ash's eyes widened.

It only lasted for a second before Misty ripped herself away, spitting excessively.

"What?" Ash asked, half dazed.

"Gross," she said, "Don't mix pickles, chocolate and strawberries. It's doesn't taste good. Don't kiss me."

Ash blinked for a moment.

"Hey!" he exclaimed, "You kissed me first!"

* * *

**A/N: you may wonder why I have done a Pokeshiping fic, when I clearly cannot write Pokeshipping.**

**Well, today is Mah internet Twinseh's birthday!  
**

**YAYAYAY! Happy birthday Chelseh! ...:.:\\(^O^):.:...**

**She is an AMAZING writer. Seriously. Check out her stories. Especially Eternal. That story...SHE IS SO GOOD AT ROLLING HUMOUR AND TENSION AND MYSTERY ALL INTO ONE! I love it! I cannot explain.**

**And I am sorry for any OOCness on either one's part. Like I said, Pokeshipping isn't probably my best shipping to attempt.**


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